So said Socrates, and variations on this theme are so often the push behind our New Year resolutions. But if you want yours to stick you need to take stock and assess the main areas of your life before setting your goals. The process is rewarding but not always easy, so you may want to call a friend to make it more fun.
1. Make the list (or download the free templates from denisebosque.com/YourYear)
2. Go somewhere you really like. Phones off!
3. Make sure you feel good. Sit up straight. Smile. Physiology matters!
4. Look at the list and decide which life area jumps out at you.
5. When you’ve decided on your goal, check your feelings. A good goal will make you feel excited, even slightly nervous.
Doubts may surface at this stage. It’s the old paradigm trying to talk you out of it (“You’re not good enough, it won’t work, you haven’t the time”). Yet when the WHY (you want this) is compelling enough, the HOW takes care of itself. Do this with conviction. This is your life; why would you play small – to avoid disappointment, ridicule, rejection, feelings of failure? Well, how disappointed would you be if you NEVER attempted something great? It’s always about the journey. Dare to go for it.
Many people are naysayers, telling you it can’t be done, why bother, you’re fine as you are, etc. What they really mean is, “Don’t do it because it will make me feel bad because I lack the courage to go for it.” Avoid them: they’ll pull you back and make you doubt yourself. Ultimately, you can participate in your life or be an onlooker; it’s up to you. Once you’re committed, it’s time to take the next steps:
6. Reprogramme old beliefs and self-image; these have to change if your goal is BIG. Who do you need to become to achieve this goal?
7. Break down your goals into smaller chunks. When you feel it’s right, begin to visualise it as if it’s already happened. Make this a daily routine to hardwire it into your brain.
8. Make a real commitment by writing things down. Also, realise that goals can change.
9. Check at least once a week to see if you’re on course, taking action towards your goals.
10. Celebrate your achievements! Only a minority of the population use their minds and emotions to get what they want, so if you’ve got this far, you’re winning!
Denise Bosque D.Hyp, MBSCH, NLPMP, EMDR, LAR
firstname.lastname@example.org | +44/0 208 894 94 55 | +44/0 7958 341 475